Raven's Story - In Loving Memory
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| Raven with her Auntie Billy |
The story of Auntie Billy and Raven deserves its own post. The bond that Raven and Auntie Billy shared was close to as strong and the one Raven and I shared. Auntie Billy was Raven's absolute favorite person. When Auntie Billy came to visit for weekends, I lost Raven for almost the entire weekend. I just hope I can capture everything without forgetting an important memory because Raven truly had Auntie Billy wrapped around her paw.
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| Raven feeling safe and loved snuggling with her Auntie Billy |
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| A repeat picture, but a precious one - Raven giving a Kissy Face to her Auntie Billy - Raven always wanted to be with her |
First, before I get into their bond and story, this is where I completely blame myself for Raven's death. Not only that, but I feel like I ruined Auntie Billy and Raven's last weekend together. I know Billy doesn't want me to feel bad, but I can't help it. It was the last weekend Billy was here that led to the fateful events. I wanted Billy to meet the little dog that bit Raven. I knew from the dog being here before that Raven and the dog were not friends, but I didn't know anything about abscesses or that Raven even got nipped. I know I went into that in the first blog post. I feel like if I hadn't have brought the dog here to meet Billy, Raven would still be alive. That's what was my fault. The drug may have sent her into kidney failure, but none of that would have happened if I hadn't brought the dog over that day. Not only that, but Raven took it out on Billy for the entire weekend. She was hissing at her and even swatted her hand, drawing blood for no reason. This was NOT Raven at all. We just thought she was jealous that she saw the dog sitting beside HER Auntie Billy. Thinking back now it might have been because she was in pain from being nipped. Perhaps a combination of pain and jealousy. Either way, I feel horrible. I don't know how to not feel responsible because it's exactly what led to me losing her. It is my fault.
I talk, I blog, I think, I read, I cry and I write to some people outside of blogging, yet none of it seems to be helping. I pretty much have every single thing listed in the below site.
http://www.petlosshelp.org/10commonquestions.html
I talk, I blog, I think, I read, I cry and I write to some people outside of blogging, yet none of it seems to be helping. I pretty much have every single thing listed in the below site.
http://www.petlosshelp.org/10commonquestions.html
From the second Auntie Billy walked in the door Raven would be all over her meowing and following her around. If it had been a very long time since Raven had seen her, she would yell loudly at her - fact! Poor Billy couldn't even go to the bathroom without Raven being upset that she left her and waiting right at the bathroom door. If we went out on the balcony for a smoke, Raven would sit at the window and meow. This was not something Raven did when I would go outside when Billy wasn't around. So, yeah, Raven got pretty upset when her Auntie Billy would leave her even for a second.
If I said to Raven, "Where's Auntie Billy?", she would go to the door. I only did that a handful of times because once I realized she understood it, I felt horrible for getting her hopes up. I was on the phone with Billy once and Raven was sitting on the bed. I said the magic words and Raven went flying off the bed and went to stare at the door. That's when I snapped the below picture. The one below that is one other time I asked her where her Auntie Billy is.
Having Auntie Billy here meant not only a lot of extra attention, but also almost unlimited hall time, since Auntie Billy would almost always let Raven out when she was having a fit at the door, and a lot of laser light play time. Raven preferred to play with the laser light with Billy more than anyone. With me she would get bored after a few minutes no matter how much I tried to do it the same as Auntie Billy does. If Billy and I were playing a game, Raven would get in her face to indicate that she wants to play with the laser light. Raven would make it impossible for Billy and I to continue doing what we were doing.
If we were just chilling and watching movies, Raven always had to be snuggling with her Auntie Billy. Normally that's what she would do with me when I am on the couch, but not when Auntie Billy was here. If she chose to sit between the two of us, she was always closer to Billy and always had to be touching her. So, yep, I basically lost my Raven every time Auntie Billy came to visit. She did still sleep with me, but we also figured out she slept with Billy half the night too.
Raven had an unusual ability to know when people were sleeping. The unusual part was that she knew to be quiet every time someone was sleeping on the couch. Normally when she talked, which was often, she was loud. A lot of people can attest to that. However, when someone was sleeping, she would still talk, but very quietly. Billy often fell asleep before I did and normally when Raven knew her and I were going to bed, she would meltdown loudly for her last feeding, but while anyone was asleep on the couch, the meltdown was very quiet. Billy actually witnessed it one morning when I woke up before she did. I came in from the balcony and Raven did her quiet meows for her normal routine.
Eventually Raven learned Billy's routines, especially in the morning. I caught it a few times. Raven and I would be sleeping and she would hear Billy get up, so she'd wake up and fly out the bedroom door. Well, I guess a couple of times she was disappointed because Billy was only going to the bathroom and then would go back to sleep. I caught Raven waiting in bed with me until she knew if Billy was going outside to have a smoke or not. If she was, then Raven would get up and fly out into the living room to go wait for her, otherwise she learned to stay in bed until she knew Auntie Billy was up for good. I was told there were a few occasions where Billy got up for a bit, played with Raven and then they both went back to bed.
A funny story that happened recently to prove just how much Raven loved her Auntie Billy, wanted to be with her and how smart Raven was. Billy was going to sleep, so she did up the couch. She wasn't quite ready to crash, so I sat on the end of the couch so we could talk for a bit. Raven jumped up on the arm of the couch beside me and started to rub her head all over my back, shoulder and head. I knew this wasn't a kissy face. I knew she was trying to move me. Then she started to up her game. She started biting my hair, gently hitting my head and then physically trying to push my off with her body. Raven even went as far as to try and "bite" my shoulder. She was trying to put my entire shoulder in her mouth. She wanted me gone and was going to great lengths to get rid of me. I finally got up and Raven thought she won. She immediately laid down with Auntie Billy, glared at me and stretched out as much as she could so there was no room for me to sit back down. Below is the proof.
I believe Auntie Billy is where Raven's love of fire trucks came from. Every time she would hear a fire truck, Raven would go running to the window. Even if she was in a dead sleep, she would get up and run to the window. It was only fire truck sirens. Not ambulances or police sirens. Billy has a love of firemen and maybe firetrucks too, but I would say more the former. On more than one occasion while Billy was here, both Billy and Raven were seen looking out the window together when there was a fire truck going by. I wish I had taken a picture of it.
Raven was always both upset and worn out by the end of the visits. Upset because when Billy left, we usually ran out first and then I would come back without her. Raven would look for her, be mad at me because she wasn't with me and then go crash for several hours. Usually she was so tired that I would have to wake her up and ask her if she wanted dinner. The fatigue came from not only all the extra play, but also because Raven rarely went to go nap the entire time Billy was here because she stayed awake every minute so as not to miss a thing.
I will forever feel horrible for ending their bond the way I did, but their bond was a joy to watch.
If I said to Raven, "Where's Auntie Billy?", she would go to the door. I only did that a handful of times because once I realized she understood it, I felt horrible for getting her hopes up. I was on the phone with Billy once and Raven was sitting on the bed. I said the magic words and Raven went flying off the bed and went to stare at the door. That's when I snapped the below picture. The one below that is one other time I asked her where her Auntie Billy is.
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| I used to use this one to guilt Billy into coming for a weekend to see her baby. |
Having Auntie Billy here meant not only a lot of extra attention, but also almost unlimited hall time, since Auntie Billy would almost always let Raven out when she was having a fit at the door, and a lot of laser light play time. Raven preferred to play with the laser light with Billy more than anyone. With me she would get bored after a few minutes no matter how much I tried to do it the same as Auntie Billy does. If Billy and I were playing a game, Raven would get in her face to indicate that she wants to play with the laser light. Raven would make it impossible for Billy and I to continue doing what we were doing.
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| Raven making sure Auntie Billy can't do anything but pay attention to her. |
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| I believe in this one, Auntie Billy got up to go in the kitchen, but another one where Raven made her presence known and demanded attention |
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| Playing with Billy and the laser light in one of her many treasured boxes Raven would get at Christmas |
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| Billy would get Raven running all over the place for that light. |
If we were just chilling and watching movies, Raven always had to be snuggling with her Auntie Billy. Normally that's what she would do with me when I am on the couch, but not when Auntie Billy was here. If she chose to sit between the two of us, she was always closer to Billy and always had to be touching her. So, yep, I basically lost my Raven every time Auntie Billy came to visit. She did still sleep with me, but we also figured out she slept with Billy half the night too.
Raven had an unusual ability to know when people were sleeping. The unusual part was that she knew to be quiet every time someone was sleeping on the couch. Normally when she talked, which was often, she was loud. A lot of people can attest to that. However, when someone was sleeping, she would still talk, but very quietly. Billy often fell asleep before I did and normally when Raven knew her and I were going to bed, she would meltdown loudly for her last feeding, but while anyone was asleep on the couch, the meltdown was very quiet. Billy actually witnessed it one morning when I woke up before she did. I came in from the balcony and Raven did her quiet meows for her normal routine.
Eventually Raven learned Billy's routines, especially in the morning. I caught it a few times. Raven and I would be sleeping and she would hear Billy get up, so she'd wake up and fly out the bedroom door. Well, I guess a couple of times she was disappointed because Billy was only going to the bathroom and then would go back to sleep. I caught Raven waiting in bed with me until she knew if Billy was going outside to have a smoke or not. If she was, then Raven would get up and fly out into the living room to go wait for her, otherwise she learned to stay in bed until she knew Auntie Billy was up for good. I was told there were a few occasions where Billy got up for a bit, played with Raven and then they both went back to bed.
A funny story that happened recently to prove just how much Raven loved her Auntie Billy, wanted to be with her and how smart Raven was. Billy was going to sleep, so she did up the couch. She wasn't quite ready to crash, so I sat on the end of the couch so we could talk for a bit. Raven jumped up on the arm of the couch beside me and started to rub her head all over my back, shoulder and head. I knew this wasn't a kissy face. I knew she was trying to move me. Then she started to up her game. She started biting my hair, gently hitting my head and then physically trying to push my off with her body. Raven even went as far as to try and "bite" my shoulder. She was trying to put my entire shoulder in her mouth. She wanted me gone and was going to great lengths to get rid of me. I finally got up and Raven thought she won. She immediately laid down with Auntie Billy, glared at me and stretched out as much as she could so there was no room for me to sit back down. Below is the proof.
I believe Auntie Billy is where Raven's love of fire trucks came from. Every time she would hear a fire truck, Raven would go running to the window. Even if she was in a dead sleep, she would get up and run to the window. It was only fire truck sirens. Not ambulances or police sirens. Billy has a love of firemen and maybe firetrucks too, but I would say more the former. On more than one occasion while Billy was here, both Billy and Raven were seen looking out the window together when there was a fire truck going by. I wish I had taken a picture of it.
Raven was always both upset and worn out by the end of the visits. Upset because when Billy left, we usually ran out first and then I would come back without her. Raven would look for her, be mad at me because she wasn't with me and then go crash for several hours. Usually she was so tired that I would have to wake her up and ask her if she wanted dinner. The fatigue came from not only all the extra play, but also because Raven rarely went to go nap the entire time Billy was here because she stayed awake every minute so as not to miss a thing.
I will forever feel horrible for ending their bond the way I did, but their bond was a joy to watch.
*For the beginning of the story, see November 2014*
*Disclaimer - I do not proof-read anything I write, so if there are typos, please excuse them.
*Disclaimer - I do not proof-read anything I write, so if there are typos, please excuse them.
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